Why Pushing Harder Is the Reason Your Body Isn’t Changing
I don’t believe in magic. And I don’t believe in the diet and exercise model either. But I do believe in something I learned from teaching Pilates — that the real transformation happens not when you push harder, but when you relax into what’s actually there. Here’s what that means for your body and your life.
What Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning Taught Me About Body Image
Someone once told me my book reminded them of Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning. I had to reread it to understand what they meant. What I found was that Frankl and I — a holocaust survivor and a woman who survived an eating disorder — were essentially saying the same things about suffering, meaning, and the freedom that comes from changing yourself when you cannot change the situation.
Are You Putting Your Faith in a Diet Culture Fantasy?
Faith and fantasy can look identical from the outside. Both keep us going despite the odds. But one grounds us in reality and the other keeps us stuck. Here’s how I finally understood the difference — and why it changes everything about how we relate to our bodies.
What If You Treated Your Body Like a Friend Instead of an Enemy?
Your body and I have something in common — we both want you to want us. Not because of a flashy headline or a before-and-after photo. Because of a real relationship. Here’s why starting with “not hostile” might be enough to change everything.
Real Eating Disorder Recovery Means Complete Freedom — Not a Life in Management
I saw a meme that said “Yes, I have an eating disorder. No, I can’t just get over it.” And I called B.S. Not because eating disorders aren’t real and painful — I know firsthand that they are. But because that belief is exactly what keeps people stuck. Here’s what real recovery actually looks like.
How My Grammy Gave Me the Food Crazies — And the Strength to Heal Them
My Grammy passed last weekend. And I realized that this entire methodology — Happy Calories Don’t Count — grew out of healing relationship dynamics that I learned from her. Here’s the legacy she left me, both the painful parts and the beautiful ones.
Why Food Freedom Is the Zen of Weight Loss
I finally went looking for Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance — and ended up with Alan Watts instead. What I found in his first lecture about the Tibetan Wheel of Life explained everything I’ve been trying to teach about getting off the diet and exercise teeter-totter. Here’s the connection.
Why Self-Help Can Make Your Relationship With Your Body Worse
I’ve explored virtually every psychological, spiritual, and self-help approach to healing. And I’ve fallen into every trap each one hides. Here’s the one that’s most dangerous — and what the road to actual peace looks like instead.
The Real Price of Happiness (It’s Not What the Self-Help World Tells You)
I was 45 minutes into a 90-minute commute for 12 miles when something unexpected washed over me — a sense of peace I hadn’t felt in years. That moment taught me something about happiness that none of the self-help work, therapy, or pillow-beating had managed to. Here’s what it was.
Why Shame Never Works — And What Actually Does
Company executives keep calling me to help shame their employees into participating in wellness programs. And I keep gently telling them the same thing — shame doesn’t work. Here’s what Rotary’s Four-Way Test taught me about motivation, accountability, and why positive reinforcement is the only approach that actually sticks.